"When dawn spreads its paintbrush on the plain, spilling purple... ," Sons of the Pioneers theme for TV show "Wagon Train." Dawn on the mythic Santa Fe Trail, New Mexico, looking toward Raton from Cimarron. -- Clarkphoto. A curmudgeon artist's musings melding metaphors and journalism, for readers in more than 150 countries.

Wednesday, November 20, 2013

Micro-managers' manifesto & guide, chapter 1

(Based on experience, observation, and stories of victims of micro-managers)
  • You must be in charge of every aspect of your subordinates' jobs
  • Trust no one
  • Boost your own ego and importance
  • Act like you're an expert in fields you have no experience in
  • Lie about directives coming from higher up
  • Demand complete agreement
  • Surround yourself with "Yes" people--sycophants who have no backbone
  • Increase your staff with such people, so you have more time to micromanage others
  • Overrule, and get even, with anyone who disagrees with you
  • Be vengeful; double talk and fear rules
  • Only give credit to others when it increases your stature
  • No independent thought or actions allowed
  • Master all the acronyms of your organization, so that nobody knows what you're talking about
  • Keep plenty of slogans handy, about being good for the students, or customers, or whoever
  • Always demand recognition for what you do from your subordinates
  • Always demand they recognize how great you are
  • Never allow independent thoughts or ideas without your prior approval
  • Insist on multiple, frequent, long meetings, without agendas
  • Use the code  words for control:  "We want to help you" 
  • Insist on uniform rules and forms for everyone
  • Lavish praise and big words on those above you
  • Always defend those above you
  • Always act like you're really on the side of the others
  • Always come up with "new" initiatives and paperwork, to keep your underlings occupied with busy work and away from meaningful, creative work
  • Always smile 

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